Not taking myself too seriously.

In the spirit of trying new things, I decided to get out of my comfort zone (again) recently. Let me back up for a second. I must admit that in the past I’ve had the tendency to take myself far too seriously. Not 100% of the time of course – because I definitely have my moments in which I am completely silly – but around anyone other than close friends, I tend to be pretty tame and reserved… Which is so not how I am around people I love and it’s not who I enjoy being!

Anyway. I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching and praying about what truly makes me happy lately, and I’ve learned that silliness makes me happy and laughter brings me joy and movement is actually something that I thrive on. I’ve recently been thinking a lot about how my identity is in Christ and only God’s opinion of me matters, and it’s done wonders for my confidence in all areas of my life. I mean, who cares if I look silly to other people?! (Yeah, I know this isn’t a super big revelation, but it’s taken me a long time to get here!) Plus, seeing Clara explore the world has made me want to expand my experience in it, but I’ve already talked about that.

So tonight I took a dance fitness class. Not a ‘this is how to dance’ class, but a ‘let’s dance for an hour and break into a sweat and get our workout on’ type class.

(I’m sorry if you expected something deeper, but I’m taking baby steps here!)

Normally I do not dance, at all. I have (practically) solo dance parties with Clara every day and with Tim sometimes and I’ve been known to do a few very reserved moves on the dance floors at weddings – but generally I have no idea what I’m doing or how to move my body to look like I mean to be doing what it’s doing. But, I knew I would have a good time dancing, so off to the studio I went!

Guys, it was so embarrassing.

I had no idea what the heck was going on for the entire hour.

My first mistake was not getting there super early, so of course I had to stand in the front and center position on the floor. Gulp.

Then the warm-up started and I knew I was in trouble. Every time we had to turn to face a certain direction, I would find myself facing everyone else in class. That’s never a good sign. I also couldn’t figure out how to move my hips, arms, legs, and feet all at the same time. How does anyone do it?! There were no instructions, so we all just followed along with the instructor to really fast-paced songs. I just kept moving my feet and waving my hands in the air and shuffling around.

All of the other people in the class had clearly been there before and were dancing with ease, which only made my ‘performance’ so much more laughable!

At one point I just thought ‘well, maybe no one is watching me!’ but that thought was quickly shattered at the end of the class, when no less than three people came up to me to ask me if it was my first class. (Gee, what gave it away?!)

They attempted to build up my self esteem by saying I did great, but I think their assumption that I must be a newbie speaks for itself.

However, I smiled the whole time. I had so much fun dancing and being silly and not allowing myself to be overly self-conscious about something that should be fun.

So I’ll definitely go back. Although, now I’m even more worried because when people ask me if it’s my first time I’ll be forced to say no… awkward!

Have you tried anything new lately? Or better yet, have you embarrassed yourself?! I can’t be the only one!

 

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