When Home Isn’t Home

It was strange traveling to Chicago for the holidays.

Moving Present: State Mugs Chicago is where I’m from. I spent over 20 years of my life there – about 15 years in the suburbs and another 7 years downtown. Tim was born and raised there and even went to college in the surrounding areas. Chicago is where Tim and I spent our first years as independent adults, where we met, where we got pregnant and had our first child, and where many of our family and friends live. So for us, going to Chicago felt like going home. (Especially since we only moved from there a little over 2 months ago.)

And when we left Chicago (after nine really fun days!) to come back to Seattle, it was really strange to be leaving our ‘home’ to be going ‘home’.

Moving Present: State Mugs

Seattle is where our house is. It’s a city I love. It’s where I feel a great sense of community. It’s where I feel like we fit in. It’s where we’re slowly meeting new people and building relationships.

But it isn’t exactly ‘home’ yet.

I wonder if I’ll have these same feelings next year.

Do you feel like home is where your house is, or is it somewhere else?

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20 Responses to When Home Isn’t Home

  1. Oh girl. I feel you. I think Columbus, Ohio is finally feeling like home after living here 3 years. Both me and Pearson grew up in Atlanta and we went to college in Arkansas. I consider both of those home. But especially Atlanta. But after traveling this holiday season, I was so ready to come home. Maybe it’s just my apartment and bed that I consider home, though. Not the city or state.

    • Lisa says:

      I’m so glad you’re starting to feel more and more settled in Columbus! I think ‘home’ can probably be different places for different reasons… but I always felt very at home in Chicago so it’s strange for me to live elsewhere!

  2. Macy Volpe says:

    Those mugs are adorable!

  3. If I had to put money on it, I bet you won’t feel the same way this time next year. Establishing enough a strong enough root system in a new place to make it feel like home takes a really long time (to be honest, that’s one of the biggest reasons why I’ve always chickened out on moving to Seattle – I don’t want to take the time to reestablish myself!). It usually took me a good year or so to really feel like my “new” place, whether that was college or Chicago, was home. And I still call my house in Michigan home – I say I’m going home for Christmas, or Thanksgiving, or any other time I’m going to my mom and dad’s house. But now Chicago is home for me, too – I have two homes! And I wouldn’t be at all surprised if as time goes on in your life in Seattle, you start to feel the same way, too 🙂

    • Lisa says:

      I bet you’re right, I’m probably going to feel like Seattle and Chicago are BOTH home. I’m definitely happier living in Seattle, so that’s awesome, but Chicago is just so familiar – you know?!

  4. 7 months into living here and I still feel the same way. I love this city, our little condo, the people we’ve met, but it’s still not home. I’m not sure if it ever will feel that way as we don’t plan to live here forever. But we’re having fun in the mean time!

    • Lisa says:

      I think it’s definitely hard when you don’t plan on truly settling in a place long term! I mean, I never felt like my college town was ‘home’ because I knew I wouldn’t be staying there longer than I had to. But I do love Seattle! (And we can’t wait to hang out with you guys again SOON!)

  5. The more places I call home, the more I feel this way. I think we end up leaving little portions of ourselves in our old places, and grow new parts of ourselves in the new places.

    • Lisa says:

      I love the way you put this. I’ll probably end up feeling like we have two homes, both Seattle and Chicago. I just can’t imagine knowing Seattle as well as I know Chicago after being there for so long!

  6. erinhzauner says:

    i even had those feelings when leaving my parent’s house for the first few years i was married…like i was leaving home to go home? how does that work. i can’t imagine being a coast away. your attitude is so wonderful.

    • Lisa says:

      Gosh, good point. I think my childhood home will always be ‘home’ and it will be weird when/if my mom eventually moves from it! Plus, when we go to Chicago we now go to the suburbs and not the city which is where Tim and I actually lived. Gosh, it’s so complicated being an adult!

  7. Rachel G says:

    I know this exact feeling. It’s weird when you go back to the same place that really was your home for so many years and now…it’s just not quite home. I was born in Michigan, and when my family moved overseas, I learned to call Michigan “home”, but when I finally returned to Michigan for college, I just felt like a foreigner.

    • Lisa says:

      Yes! So true. Chicago feels like home because it’s familiar, but it definitely doesn’t feel like it’s our home anymore. Seattle feels like our home but it’s still unfamiliar to us… so strange!

  8. Bash Harry says:

    I understand what you mean. House is not a home, nor is home a house. Home is where your heart is and that’s in Chicago. It’s okay to have these feelings, but we learn to accept it. Perhaps Seatlle can be a new home <3

    xx Bash | H E Y   B A S H | bloglovin’

  9. Lisa C says:

    I’ve moved a lot, so home is where I want it to be. Though Colorado Springs and Blacksburg are the two cities that have felt more like home than anywhere else.

  10. Sarah Brooks says:

    I loved this post! We moved from AZ (my home) about 1 1/2 years ago to NC. We didn’t move because of a job, we moved because we wanted to. I have to admit, I have LOVED living here!! However, ever since the holidays (so the last two weeks haha), I have been yearning for home. I miss my family, I miss my friends, and I get sad thinking my little girls won’t be growing up near their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. It’s weird because these feeling just recently set in. I guess we’ll see what happens – either they’ll go away or we’ll move back if they don’t, haha!

    • Lisa says:

      We moved to Seattle because we wanted to, too! I’m glad you’ve been adjusting well! I also love and appreciate your attitude of ‘well, if I still feel this way in a while, we’ll just move back’ because that’s the same thought process I had when we first moved here. Of course I’m hoping we love it, but if not, we can always change our circumstances again!

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