Ohhhh feminism… what a loaded word that is, right!?
If you’ve been reading this blog for any amount of time (or better yet, if you know me in “real life”!) you probably know that I identify with being feminist.
But then again, I think most women (and men) probably do, even if they’d rather not use the term.
And I get why people wouldn’t want to necessarily identify with feminists… kind of. I mean, there are extremists in every belief and I’m sure there are extreme feminists that a lot of women can’t identify with.
And some people believe that feminism doesn’t even have to be a thing anymore (in the States), since men and women are “equal”. (We got the right to vote years ago!)
But I think feminism is still important and incredibly relevant.
You see, women are still making 77 cents for every dollar than their male counterparts are making. And that, my friends, is craziness. We’re talking same work, same qualifications, different pay.
And this inequality doesn’t really bother some of us, but until this (among other equality issues) are fixed, feminism is still incredibly relevant.
Everyone has their own ideas about what ‘equality’ is and what feminism actually means. And honestly, I could spend hours searching through articles to find a more precise meaning and to define all relevant issues right now, but I’m not going to (I’ve read a lot of them before).
Instead, I want to share what feminism means to me:
… Equal pay. I can’t believe more people aren’t fighting for this. This is such a male issue, too! A man who relies on his partner’s income for a portion of their family income is most definitely affected when his wife is making 77% of what she deserves to be making. The disparity affects men, children, women… it’s a family issue.
… Females in leadership positions. There are so many reasons that women have a harder time getting promotions or put into leadership positions, and some of them are valid. However, to me feminism means that women are able to hold these positions, if they’re qualified, and I’m happy that we live in a time and place where women can hold high positions whether it be political, in business, or in any other area.
… The choice to stay at home. I don’t believe that to be a feminist a woman has to be in the workforce, and I don’t think being a stay at home mom/wife/etc is anti-feminist. I simply believe that a woman should have a choice as to whether she would like to work or not, and whether it makes sense as a family unit for her to stay at home or to work. This means that I don’t believe that women should always be the one to stay at home with the kids, but I believe it’s definitely the right choice for many families.
… Having household responsibilities that make sense. Growing up, my mom did 100% of all household tasks. She was a stay-at-home-mom/wife and this is how my parents split responsibilities. I would say it worked for them, but it clearly didn’t seeing as they ended up getting divorced. However, I’m sure it does work for some families. I think the main thing for me is that women and men should have the conversation about who does what, and it should make sense based on individual skills/talents. I’m better than the Husband at finances (oh hey, CPA), so I take care of that in our family. The Husband does a lot of the cleaning, I also do a lot of the cleaning… and we both take turns at cooking depending on the night. I think that there are a million different “correct” ways to divide household tasks, but I think the expectation should be to split them equally, unless there’s a reason not to. (Doesn’t this sound so obvious?!)
… Being able to open the door, but not needing to. You see, I can open doors for myself, and sometimes, I do! But, I’m not so independent-feeling that I need to prove to everyone that I CAN open the door by not allowing a guy to open it for me. Of course, this can be said for things other than just opening doors (like carrying suitcases, for example!), but in my world women can open doors, but if a man is around, it’s still good manners for him to open it for her.
… Choices about health. I know this is a huge debate so I don’t even want to get started on it, but I strongly believe that legally women should have the right to terminate a pregnancy if they don’t want to be pregnant/have a child. I think this is a hugely complicated issue and I’m morally opposed to having an abortion, but I think women need to be able to make these decisions for themselves.
… Challenging “norms”. I’ve talked about the name debate before (and I will again), but to me, feminism is being able to challenge (certain) societal norms and not be judged for it. So, in our (the Husband and my) case, I decided not to take the Husband’s last name – which I don’t really view as a feminist decision, but I suppose other people see it as one. I think the fact that I’m able to make this decision and not be forced legally to change my name is awesome, but it’d be even more awesome if people viewed our decision as totally acceptable and not ’emasculating’ to the Husband.
… Less photoshopping. Women in ads and on magazines are so photoshopped they don’t even resemble real women anymore, which is of course, a problem for many reasons. I think feminism is about recognizing the beauty and uniqueness and strengths of all women and not accepting distorted images of women as real or even perfection.
… Independence. I strongly believe that women (especially while they’re single) should be able to pay for their own stuff, travel by themselves, make smart financial decisions, and generally be able to get along in the world perfectly fine. However, I also think that I personally need my husband, and I don’t think it’s weak to admit that. I don’t need him financially (although the paycheck is nice!) but I do need him for moral support and as a best friend. I could probably survive by myself, but it’s a heck of a lot easier with a partner by my side.
OK I know I’m probably missing a bijillion things that I think about all the time and simply forgot to put on this little list.
So tell me, what does feminism mean to you? Do you identify as a feminist?
Cheers to equality!
